This assumes you are on the run and not taking a defensive position. Offense is something you should expect in any situation. Lots of this is inspired by The Zombie Survival Guide. The list is in no particular order.


This is like a shovel on steroids. Shaolin Monks used them as both weapons and tools. Either side will usually result in decapitation of Z’s. If you can find one, it is the ultimate weapon against Z’s. A shovel is an acceptable substitute if one can not be found.


A hand bow is a small one handed crossbow. It does not have the accuracy, power, or range of a normal sized crossbow, but it’s light and good at a medium range. You could also place a scope on one of these babies. Remember, stick to the weapons that will not run out of ammunition unless absolutely necessary. Also, you still need both hands to reload one of these.


Ok, I’m not exactly an expert on guns, but this is my choice of gun for fighting Z’s. Actually, I wouldn’t use a gun because I know that the noise will attract more Z’s, and they run out of ammo pretty fast. However, I think this will be great in a last stand against the brain eating overlords.



This is basically chain mail designed to be used by divers to protect them from shark bites. Yes, motherfucking shark bites. I am certain this will also protect you from the bite of Z’s. Remember, the force could still break a limb, but at least you won’t be infected.

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You really want to stay away from loud noises. This makes cars and motorcycles out of the question. Bicycles are quiet and will transport you faster than walking could. Let us hope that Zombies never gain the ability to ride these. We would be screwed.


These are backpacks. That hold water. Or whatever liquid you put in them, I guess. I would recommend sticking with water. I never would have survived summer P.E. without one of these.


This is one of the greatest inventions ever. It’s a cigar sized straw that can be put in dirty water and it will filter out all the nasty stuff. Normal water filters would work too, but this is so much cooler. You’ll be the cool guy of the zombie apocalypse.


Okay, this may sound weird, but you need some books. You need a form of entertainment that doesn’t need batteries or anything. If you see a book, pick it up. I’d only carry one at a time so it won’t slow you down much, but they are definitely necessary.


These are flashlights that you shake to charge. This will be invaluable to you and will also make you look like a pro zombie survivor. No need to worry about batteries! Just don’t use it too much. You don’t want to attract any Z’s!


You won’t last long without these. Humans are social beings. You need interaction, and they will help you in many ways. You will get more sleep with alternating shifts and you know some one will have your back. Oh, and if one’s slowing you down, you can throw him into the Z’s to slow them down a bit.

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